Today I want to share one of the weirdest things that has happened to me during my time as a myasthenic. My consultant has now verified that it is indeed odd so I feel comfortable letting know about my secret powers.
It all began when I left hospital following my thymectomy. A couple of days after returning home, I felt the crush of cabin fever and knew I needed to break free. I wanted a relatively easy walk – preferably inside as the weather wasn’t great. As I was recommended against keyhole surgery, I chose the full open chest option and was still feeling very fragile. This meant anywhere too hectic was also out for fear of being bumped into.
Elaine, my mum and I decided to go to a nearby shopping centre as it met most of my requirements. When we walked into the first shop and the alarm went off, we didn’t think anything of it. But when the alarm in the second shop we entered, and then the third, fourth and fifth, started ringing as I stepped over the threshold – we all looked at each other puzzled.
I had made jokes about the surgeon leaving a piece of medical equipment inside me, but I didn’t think there would be many shop tags in the operating room. However, I’ve found since that day, in certain shops, I set off the store alarms going in and out. Usually my ‘I’ve got metal in my chest’ line covers it even though I was sure that shop alarms don’t go off with metal. I guess it’s the embarrassment factor that stops the shop security guards giving me a pat down.
Explaining this to my consultant, we discussed the technology used in shop alarms and both thought that it was some kind of radio frequency. He suggested that it might be the way the wires holding my breast bone together have been inserted. That somehow they are communicating with the machines, but did say he hadn’t heard of it before. I think I know better.
Naturally, I believe that during my operation I must have gained some superhero powers that I will be able to utilise for good as soon as I find out how. A letter to my surgeon should confirm or deny this. In the mean time, I’m going to be working on my name, theme tune and outfit.