I’m not a natural leader. I get tongue-tied in the spotlight as I’m a much better written communicator. This hasn’t been helped by the myasthenia gravis as when my symptoms are flaring I feel extremely self conscious. I am still traumatised by the speech issues MG causes and, when speaking to a group, I tend to get so paranoid my words will start slurring that my delivery isn’t great.
However, my personality is a big part driver, (read more about different personality types here), I’m hardworking and I’m ambitious. These attributes, along with being in the right place at the right time, have led me to manage a team and today I had to lead a discussion with the communications department on the future of digital.
At previous times in my life, this spotlight would have filled me with dread, but today I enjoyed it. Although I know it shouldn’t matter, as mentioned in my post regarding vanity, it made a big difference that my symptoms were virtually non existent (I could pass for a normal). With around 15 pairs of eyes on me, I managed to mix up my words once or twice and couldn’t shake the fear of my voice going (particularly as I’m reducing the steroids). Still, I think it was a useful discussion and hopefully it gave my colleagues some food for thought.
While it may be another thing I can add to the list of things that are easier to do when my MG symptoms are reduced, I’m proud of myself. So today’s photo is me shining bright.