After hearing about a couple of people who have recently been diagnosed with conditions, I’ve been thinking about different styles of coping that I’ve witnessed. No one way is right – each person needs to figure out how to come to terms with their new life in their own time.
Saying that, I have noticed something that people who are still able to live full and meaningful lives share:
They don’t focus on what their condition stops them from doing
Sure everyone has moments of frustration and negativity, but, from what I’ve witnessed, focusing on what you can do rather than what you can’t is what stops you from giving into your condition. It doesn’t only make you cope, it helps you flourish.
For example, when a friend of mine was diagnosed with multiple scelorosis (MS) she decided to write a list of all the things she wanted to do. One of the reasons was the thought that one day she might not be able to do some of them but she knew, for now, there was lots that she could do. This attitude helped her embrace her new life and every time I meet her I’m filled with wonder about the way she copes.
Like my friend, at this moment in time for everything that I can’t do, there are 100 things that I can. Focusing on the can rather than the can’t makes the world as wonderful a place as it was before my diagnosis.